Some Truths

I have this fear that my life is a story.

I worry I will one day faint down the stairs.

When my body crashes and I feel worse, my body self esteem dips.

I’m good at being the bigger person when someone else can’t be.

I’m always the one to speak. I’m not sure I like that.

I can’t think of any deep, dark secrets I have.

Sometimes I sip water as though my life depends on finishing the bottle. I wish it could be my salvation.

I think that as a child I suppressed my jealous streak, but it’s still in there somewhere. Maybe that’s my deep, dark secret.

I miss not knowing about the horrible things that happen in the world.

Just some truths today. What are yours?

Ella

Song Quote:

Sometimes I think that I think too much. – Hold You, Nina Nesbitt

The Gas Station Anecdote

Last week I took the car to get cleaned and sat on a nearby chair reading a book. At first I didn’t understand why everyone was giving me these weird looks, and then I realized I’m a girl sitting in a gas station reading Ernest Hemingway. Now I get it.

As supremely uncomfortable as I was, I buried my nose in my book and didn’t look up until it was time to give the tip. Which I first dropped on the floor. Because I’m just cool like that. I also started driving without popping the right mirror back in place. Because I’m cool like that. I then awkwardly leaned over the right seat and flailed my phalanges at it while the man waited next to me. But only because I’m cool like that.

Good story.

Anecdotally,

Ella

Have you had a similar experience? Or are you just generally cool like I am? Tell me in the comments below!

Song Quote:

I wish that I could be like the cool kids. –Cool Kids, Echosmith

~~~

“The Anecdotes” is a series of fairly mundane life occurrences documented by Ella. They are a result of a busy schedule that has led to an upsetting lull in posting. Ella hopes The Anecdotes will amuse you as they amuse her and that you will join her in recognizing the reality of every situation she is in. She will now stop talking in third person because she’s pretty sure she’s insane. Read the full introduction here.

The Anecdotes – An Introduction 

“The Anecdotes” is a series of fairly mundane life occurrences documented by Ella. They are a result of a busy schedule that has led to an upsetting lull in posting. Ella hopes The Anecdotes will amuse you as they amuse her and that you will join her in recognizing the reality of every situation she is in. She will now stop talking in third person because she’s pretty sure she’s insane.

The Anecdotes will be posted sporadically and irresponsibly, but that is their beauty. Like life, they are unexpected and occasionally charming. Though a break from the regular writing style on here, they are nonetheless as sufficient and as satisfying as the usual. And way more causal.

Share the love.

Ella

(Do not fret and do not frown, both regular posts and Anecdotal posts will contain the trademark song quotes. I would never let you down like that.)

Song Quote:

We like you, this is a game already won, the time has come, stop trying. -Stop Trying, Sia

 

Are you excited to read Anecdotes?! Let me know in the comments below!

A Letter to My Enemy

Writing-A-Letter

Dear Fibromyalgia,

I’d like to talk doogree with you.

           Doogree- straightforwardly, with no beating around the bush

I am no longer naïve enough to believe that despite your presence I can make my life the way I’d like it to be. I am old enough now to realize that I can never make peace with you. I will never be my truest self until I am rid of you.

Did you hear that? I will not be free until I am free of you.

You are constricting me. You are suffocating me. You are the enemy I fear, the pain I dread, and the negative I cannot escape. You. Suck.

My friends wonder how I do it, how I live with you in my life. I wonder why.

I just want to make sure you are not mistaken on this: we are not friends. It has been years and I tolerate you, but that does not mean I do not hate you with every fiber of my being.

See what I did there?

There is not much more to say.

The next time I write to you, I hope it will be a goodbye.

Ella

Song Quote:

Light up, light up, as if you have a choice. –Run, Snow Patrol