Ready For a Zombie Apocalypse

You heard me. I’m ready. I have a bunch of vegan and vegetarian friends, there is food hidden all around my room, and my sisters recently counted how many bathtubs and sinks we have and came to the same conclusion I have: we’re ready.

 

Which is not to say we believe in such things. We’re just ready. Better safe than sorry.

 

Okay, obviously I’m kidding. Although everything I have said is true. The friends, the food, the bathtubs- all real. I’m writing this because I only just realized that zombie apocalypses have been a sub-theme of my past few days. Probably because I have been thinking about our worst fears.

 

Are they destined to come true? Because two major ones of mine have.

 

One thing I have been afraid of ever since my sister got sick has been getting Fibromyalgia. Check that off the list people. I was diagnosed with it this summer.

 

Another has been cancer. Put half a check on the list. The growth was around before I was diagnosed with Fibro, but the results of the second biopsy came after. Half a check because it seems like now everything is fine, after the surgery to remove it.

 

My point is, if two core fears of mine have come true in the past nine months, will all of them come true? I watched a documentary portraying a woman who lived her entire life in fear that a man with a knife would break into her house, and then one day it happened. So thinking beyond the fact that I have to stop watching weird documentaries (there are awesome ones about gypsies too), maybe our fears are meant to warn us about what’s going to happen?

If that’s true, I’m in for the long haul.

 

I try not to live my life in fear of anything. When I break that personal policy, it’s to contemplate how awful it would be to lose another family member. But night after night, this idea about fears keeps haunting me: are they going to come true?

 

I’ve had enough suffering in my life, and I’m nowhere near even being an adult. I like to think that maybe I’m getting my suffering over with now, so that when I’m older, I can be more free. If not that positive outlook, then maybe there is just so much suffering planned for my life, that I was done the favor of having it spread out over my entire existence so that it never becomes too much?

 

Deep thoughts such as these are what keeps me up at night. These, and worrying that my non-existent pink piggy bank will be broken into in sleep, worrying that the sun will fall (what would happen…), worrying that I will get a stain on the rug of the family I babysit for (that rug if freakin’ pristine), and worrying that my apple might get depressed. I’m versatile.

I’m going to end this late night rant with one thought- if fears aren’t meant to be foreshadowing our futures, do they do us more bad than good?

Dream happy dreams,

Ella

 

P.s. Starting to see the source of the ‘tired’ in my name?

Song quote:

But it’s harder than you think telling dreams from one another. – Daniel In The Den, Bastille

thinking by Luis Alves

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9 comments on “Ready For a Zombie Apocalypse

  1. alvara101 says:

    You’ve got a very valid point there. I have had some nightmares come true, but I’ve been able to avoid my worst ones. I find comfort in my closest friends who drag my mind off troubling things. Because I KNOW that if I linger on it, it’s more likely to come true. But life is going to have those trials and troubles and making it through them will either ruin you, or build you up. Making you prepared for the next hardship.

    P.S. We only have two bath tubs… but I got swords and lots of other weapons so I’m good on the Zombie thing. My cousin even told me so.

    Best wishes and fishes
    ~Alv

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  2. retrokoriy says:

    This is awesome (^_^)

    Like

  3. retrokoriy says:

    This is awesome…… (^_^)

    Like

  4. You make me smile. Love your musings and rants.

    Like

  5. msinop1 says:

    You Ella are one brilliant being. Yes, your spirit is far beyond your human years. This my dear is your Strength in this life, to work for a greater good, just you wait and see. P.S. I have Fibromyalgia too, I am always in pain of some sort. Yet I rarely tell anyone (and I tell everything) Don’t know why?

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  6. auntieyol says:

    It is somewhere in the book of Sandra Champlain: We Don’t Die…

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  7. auntieyol says:

    They do come true if you believe them. As well. I am reading a book of a woman who’s father had cancer and given months to live. With retraining of his brain, his way of of thinking, he was able to live 30 more years cancer free. It disappeared ! Can you believe that? Of course you can, because it happened!

    Many scientists believe that everything we see in the physical state starts with a Thought. Thought is energy. Energy is creation. We are co-creators of reality at subconscious levels we are not aware of.

    I can send you to the reference book if you ask me. Enough with that negative thoughts. Reprogram your mind to think healthy. God bless you.

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  8. rosesigner says:

    I loved this post, I am glad there are people out there who think like I do. One thought, I think fears are good, only if you don’t let them overwhelm you. It’s ok to have them. Just don’t let them control you.

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  9. My biggest fear is no where near as deep or meaningful as yours, but I figured I’d share it. I’m terrified of my identity being stolen. Everyone makes fun of me for it, but I just worry about it all the time.
    Having said that, I’m kept up most nights by smaller worries– like did I finish that homework or did I just put it away for later and forget? Or did I offend person X when I made joke Y? Or things like that.
    Anyway, I hope enough of your fears have come true for your life– it sounds to me like they have. And if more do, I hope your friends & family & blog (maybe?) help you through them…

    Like

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