I Am Strong


I’m done. I am done with being sick. I don’t care if my body agrees with me or not. I am ready to be healthy again. My fears will all go away. My worries will come to naught. My strength will come to light.

It’s time to get my life back. No, that’s wrong: it’s not time to get my life back, it’s time to get my life. A life in which I am able to achieve what I set my mind to, a life in which I am no longer held back by things that are not in my control, a life in which I am free.

Freedom is a simple word with a simple concept. The definition of freedom is:

1. The power or right to determine action (think, speak, act) as one wants without hindrance or restraint

2. Exemption from external control, interference, regulation etc.

3. The quality or state of being free

But the truth is, that freedom means something completely different for each and every one of us. There are the technical definitions of the word, and then there are the definitions we hear about in songs, read about in books, hear about from the people we look up to and figure out for ourselves.

I’ve been waiting for freedom for a long time. I haven’t been sitting around waiting for a phone call to tell me I’m free. I’ve been working hard. I don’t think that sheer will power is going to make my Fibro go away. If that were true, it would have happened already. I’m not sure I believe that the current treatment plan will help me. I don’t know if this will ever go away.

But I do believe that I am strong. Until now, I was hoping that my strength would help me through. Well, I’m done with that. Now, today, I know that my strength will help me through. I don’t know when, and I don’t know how, but I am strong and it will happen. I don’t care that this week was bad, that I was clearly not better this week. I don’t care that I don’t get to eat comfort food. I don’t care that I have to force myself to exercise even when my body is screaming with pain, trying to shut down because it doesn’t agree with me that I should be moving.

I care about the fact that I don’t get to participate in things with my friends. I care about the people who have been with me all this time. I care about getting better. It’s time.

Are you with me?

Yours truly,



Song Quote:

If the clouds don’t clear, then we’ll rise above it, we’ll rise above it. –Before the Worst, The Script



Quotes about freedom that I used in a speech I wrote last year:

Freedom is not worth having at all if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes. -Mahatma Gandhi

The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud.  -Coco Chanel

I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. -S.G, Tellntyre

You wanna fly, you have to give up the sh*t that weighs you down. -Toni Morrison, Song of Solomon

It was, he thought, the difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to the death and walking into the arena with your head held high. Some people, perhaps, would say that there was little to choose between the two ways, but Dumbledore knew — and so do I, thought Harry, with a fierce rush of pride, and so did my parents — that there was all the difference in the world.  – JK Rowling

22 comments on “I Am Strong

  1. Anna says:

    I am totally with you! At some point, enough is enough and we have to just simply believe in our own ability to change our circumstances. Whether it happens today, tomorrow or who knows when, we just keep on making it happen, moment by moment, creating our own heaven on earth despite all signs to the contrary. You have my absolute support!!


  2. Lena says:

    I feel you so much. Right now I’m at that point of being sick if my sickness. I do hate it right now. But in the other hand it helped me a lot with finding myself.


  3. Arliss says:

    Thank you for caring, for yourself, for your loved ones and all those out there who have something to share and connect about. My mother has struggled for most of her life with fibromyalgia; therefore I feel in tune with it’s twists and turns more so than most ‘un-sufferers’. I applaud you and encourage your foward motion.

    You may enjoy this: https://myspace.com/saraevansmusic/music/song/a-little-bit-stronger-73248907?play=1


  4. positivepain says:

    Love this blog. Very inspiring! I have a chronic pain condition and have a similar positive, adaptive approach. Your strength is inspiring and I look forward to reading many more of your blogs. :)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. joslyne says:

    Um . . . can I just say how much I love that you have an inspirational quote from Harry Potter!!! Not only are you strong, you are awesome!!!!!


  6. This was a very nice post. I will be coming back to read more :)


  7. Owen says:

    With you and that freedom has eluded me for years until I understood that it’s already here


  8. I hope you will not think I am making less of your physical ailment by my comment. That is not my intent. We all have ailment. You are just lucky enough to know what yours is. That is to say that yours is fibromyalgia – Mine is more of a deep character flaw. We both suffer from something Yours causes pain and lose of mobility – mine causes pain and lose of growth. Many people do not have the awareness or ability to know that which is holding them in it’s grips. We all have malady of sorts. We are human. We are not perfect. But you and I are blessed that we know what our malady is and we can keep it from ruling who we are.


  9. Hi Ella beautiful name by the way. I see that you are on a journey as well, and young too. The best time to travel, and find yourself. Believe it or not, your medical issue can be seen as a blessing in disguise, but it’s for you to learn what that is. Hopefully we can help and encourage each other and others as we travel this journey of life. God bless!


  10. crabbymommy says:

    You are an inspiration for people who read you. I am not sure I’d have the strength that you seem to have in abundance.

    “It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness” – Confucius


  11. red1263 says:

    After reading this, I really hope you get to feel that freedom that you’ve been longing for.


  12. moxyjen says:



  13. You can do it! You are stronger than your illness!


  14. Amen! I love this. Sometimes attitude has a lot to do with how we feel physically. Reread this whenever you start to feel bad. It is very inspiring!


  15. risinghawk says:

    I am with you! Peace . . .


  16. Tanya says:

    There’s something amazing about that moment when you take stock of your life and recent experience and you recognise your own strength :-)


  17. daphshen says:

    Good luck! I know you can do it!


  18. Topaz says:

    What a beautiful post. Hang in there – things will get better. xx


  19. markvnathan says:

    With you all the way! Just takes the first step, the hardest. After that, you’re laughing. I know you have the strength!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s